Some of the funniest stupid people are criminals. Or, I suppose, sometimes just would be criminals. The next few entries will be of this variety.
All retail chains seem to have this same problem. Someone steals merchandise from one location and then tries to return it at another. Of course, sometimes they just pull it off your shelf with you watching, take it to the counter, and ask you to give them a refund for it. Wondering if it was boldness or stupidity that prompted them, I would always ask which. None of them ever gave me an actual answer though. Oh well.
A known thief comes into the store wanting to return an HDMI cable. A $129.99 HDMI cable with no receipt that supposively came from my store. I knew it was stolen. We hadn’t sold any of those in a long while. We even just got an email from another location a couple miles from us saying a person matching his description just stole it from them. Before I could say anything though, he automatically starts into his rehearsed “reason” for returning it. First, he says it didn’t work. I ask what he was using it on. (HDMI cables are used to feed high definition signals from one device to another. I.e. DVD to TV.) “I don’t really know what this is for. Actually, I bought it as a gift for my mom but she just didn’t want it. Said she already has plenty of those.”
Please, please, please, if you’re gonna steal something then try returning it, at least know what manner of thing it is. You don’t buy anything that costs $129. and not know what it is or does. Retard.
I told him for returns on things like that we have to attach a copy of the customers id, and asked for his driver license. Thinking I’m about to give him the money, he offers not only his license, but his social security card as well! I made copies of both. (The police really got a kick out of that.) Then, in the most absolute, matter of fact, long winded, bluntness, complete with demeaning tone, explained that I was not able to return him any money nor the $129.99 piece of stolen merchandise. That didn’t go over so well. Turns out he had a long history of aggravated assault charges. Police, arriving narrowly in time, ended up hauling him away on a regional warrant for assault with deadly weapon.